Searching for the Truth in the King James Bible;
Finding it, and passing it on to you.

Steve Van Nattan



By Pastor Steve Van Nattan


Here is a joke that I received recently in E-Mail.

A Jewish kid was doing terrible in school.  He had flunked and changed schools several times, and the parents were running out of options.  So in desperation, the boy's parents put him in a Christian School.  To their amazement, the Jewish boy did fantastic.  Math, which was his worst subject previously, became his best subject.  He was getting straight "A's".  

Finally, the parents could not contain their curiosity.  They told him they had to know why he did so well in a Christian School.

He told them, "The first day I walked into my math class, I saw this picture on the wall of a "plus" sign. And when I saw this guy with bad grades hanging on the plus sign dying, I decided right there that I better get very good grades."

I did not give you the joke to amuse you--  This is here to show you the problem we are discussing.  This joke was not passed on by an Atheist or God hater.  It was sent to me by a brother who also sends some of the most useful material I receive from friends.  


Now, someone will say, "Look, that could actually happen."

So what, my dear Christian jerk?  If it did happen, it would not be funny.  For one thing, the school involved would be Roman Catholic, and the crucifix is a blasphemous attempt to keep Jesus dead while they exalt Mary.  Also, if such a thing happened, the teacher would have a great opportunity to tell the kid the Gospel and let him know the picture had nothing to do with math.

I don't understand it, but I have been receiving piles of trashy jokes about Jesus, Peter, heaven, and all sorts of perversions of the Bible and its teachings.  I am also convinced this is the result of the lightweight approach to holiness we now find in the Charismatic movement and some Fundamentalists.  Holy laughter and other manifestations have bred followers who think joking about  the Godhead and the Word of God is OK. Their pastors lead them in this.  One noted evangelist from South Africa, Rodney Howard Brown, makes cheap jokes about all things Christian in his performances.  Thus the saints feel free to make foolishness of the things of God and His Church.

Ephesians 5:4 Neither filthiness, nor foolish talking, nor jesting, which are not convenient: but rather giving of thanks.

Proverbs 26:12 Seest thou a man wise in his own conceit? there is more hope of a fool than of him. 19 So is the man that deceiveth his neighbour, and saith, Am not I in sport?

Proverbs 10:23 It is as sport to a fool to do mischief: but a man of understanding hath wisdom.

Colossians 4:6 Let your speech be alway with grace, seasoned with salt, that ye may know how ye ought to answer every man.

Psalm 103:1 Bless the LORD, O my soul: and all that is within me, bless his holy name.

1 Thessalonians 4:11 And that ye study to be quiet, and to do your own business, and to work with your own hands, as we commanded you;

Some folks think that a big loud jesting mouth is the mark of a great person.  This kind of fool is a big pain in the posterior to the Lord's Church.  They are always hanging around waiting for the spiritual and God honoring conversation to lull so that they can tell their latest Peter-at-the-pearly-gates joke.  Bah!  Get out of my life you sleazy creep.



There is a joke that goes like this:

A man visits an old farmers garden, and he observes, "The Lord certainly has blessed you with a beautiful garden."

The farmer replies, "Yes, but you should have seen it before I got here and God had it all to himself."

This joke implies that God is a trashy gardener. It shows that the joke teller has a blasphemous notion of creation:

Genesis 1:11 (KJV) And God said, Let the earth bring forth grass, the herb yielding seed, and the fruit tree yielding fruit after his kind, whose seed is in itself, upon the earth: and it was so.
12 And the earth brought forth grass, and herb yielding seed after his kind, and the tree yielding fruit, whose seed was in itself, after his kind: and God saw that it was good.
13 And the evening and the morning were the third day.

God's garden was a good garden according to him. God is said to actually be a gardener:

Genesis 2:8 (KJV) And the LORD God planted a garden eastward in Eden; and there he put the man whom he had formed.
9 And out of the ground made the LORD God to grow every tree that is pleasant to the sight, and good for food; the tree of life also in the midst of the garden, and the tree of knowledge of good and evil.
10 And a river went out of Eden to water the garden; and from thence it was parted, and became into four heads.

Genesis 2:15 (KJV) And the LORD God took the man, and put him into the garden of Eden to dress it and to keep it.

So, it is God's garden, and I am the keeper.

If I do not keep the garden of God, it will not die. It will grow "wild". That is not the notion that God's garden, without a human keeper, has reverted to rubbish. It means that God provided that the garden will self-propagate and survive even if I don't participate. That is the miracle of "wild country."

The jerk who first told the above joke probably pays good money and takes vacations to go see National Parks and wildlife areas. The point is, people who keep gardens often become vain and proud of their handiwork. They need to remember who planted the first garden.

If I participate as keeper, I fulfill God's plan for his garden with a human population.

The idea that God's garden is a weed patch without me is the result of evolutionist thinking. Man thinks he is the pinnacle of evolution, and his magic touch makes all things good.

NO-- God made all things good.

The above joke, therefore, is blasphemous. I have labored this point to show that joking about biblical things and God's works has NO precedent in the Word of God. None of the Apostles told jokes about God and Bible accounts. Why should we?

Here is my favorite "wild garden" that shows what God did without my help,

Treats from God's "wild garden"

Also, I don't understand these leaders who plan a preaching conference, and then they make sure that a Bible toting comedian is included.  They say it is for, "Comic relief."  Well I want to know where in the New Testament Jesus, Peter, Paul, or any other man of God provided comic relief.  This is a play to amuse the saints.  

AMUSE-  Latin- A Muse-  Against thinking.

Check it out.  There is NO amusement in Jesus, nor is there in any of the 66 books of the Bible.  God expects his saints to be quite content with straight forward fellowship and sound teaching.  Any time the saints seem to get overloaded with good things, the solution is to SING Psalms and spiritual songs.  Anything else is mongrel Christianity.

There are these one liners which don't seem so bad.  They are a play on words in the Bible.  They are cheap trash.  I give you another example so that you won't be able to say you didn't understand--  I shall give two...

Why couldn't they play cards on the ark?  Answer:  Mrs. Noah sat on the deck.

The shortest man in the Bible was the Centurion-- He slept on his watch.

This kind of humor would NEVER be found in Mecca.  Indeed, a number of pagan godless religions are far more reverent than most of you alleged Christians.  You may think this sort of stuff proves your liberty-- liberty to trash the Word of God in Trivia.  WRONG--  You are simply showing how little you really respect and love the Bible and the great truths God has handed you.  Do you truly think you will run around heaven telling these cheap jokes?  If so, you are damned to hell.  How could you see the saints in the Glory making jokes at the foot of God's throne, AND at His expense?  You are not born again, and that is your problem.

1 Timothy 3:8 Likewise must the deacons be grave, not doubletongued, not given to much wine, not greedy of filthy lucre;

1 Timothy 3:11 Even so must their wives be grave, not slanderers, sober, faithful in all things.

How can a leader in the Lord's Church be a jokster and prankster?  

There is a local Fundamental Baptist church in Michigan (and, I gather thousands more around the USA) where the pastor and deacons spend about 15 to 20 minutes at the beginning of the morning service chopping back and forth at each other in good old boy fashion. The people roar with delight. Is this the work of the Holy Ghost? Not possible, and any so-called evangelist who goes from church to hog pen doing comedian performances, interspersed with the Gospel, is NOT a pastor or elder-- He is a pig.  Interestingly enough, these boys are almost always 300 pounds and up in weight.  They are God's slobs, and God doesn't need any.

This is NOT a problem of only the Charismatics.  I find this laugh-in-God's-face "ministry" in some of the best Fundamental, KJV Only, Bible Baptist churches.  BAH!  You babies.  You are so sure of your narrow position, and then, "Ha Ha Ha, let's have a good laugh on God."



Jeremiah 25:27 Therefore thou shalt say unto them, Thus saith the LORD of hosts, the God of Israel; Drink ye, and be drunken, and spue, and fall, and rise no more, because of the sword which I will send among you.

Revelation 3:16 So then because thou art lukewarm, and neither cold nor hot, I will spue thee out of my mouth.

"Oh my," you say, "That is only for the Laodiceans, not us Fundamental Bible believers."

Oh?  So, I gather that you don't think it is possible to be KJV Only, Baptist, Old line Pentecostal, narrow on personal standards, AND to be Laodicean.  Think again.  

Who would the devil's favorite person be?  

Answer--  A person just like you, but who makes jokes of God and His holy things.  In fact, I think one of the hallmarks of the End Times Church is that it just couldn't get serious about the Truth.  
Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha-- roll on the floor-- laugh and scream.

What a blessing you are to Satan.  You, indeed, may be part of God's vomit.  How could you be born again?  Who would EVER take you seriously in the world?  How could you win souls with your Jay Leno Christianity?  I know Catholic priests who would not think of making such jokes of the holy things.  Many do, to be sure, but I have met a number of priests who would just walk away if I started that.

Revelation 22:15 For without are dogs, and sorcerers, and whoremongers, and murderers, and idolaters, and whosoever loveth and maketh a lie.

It is loving and making a lie to say you love and reverence God and His Word, and then you mock God and His Word as a funny book.  

I am 1000% bigoted on this one.  You may well feel the need to write a letter of repentance.  
Feel free--  I would be happy to read that.

Did you hear the one about the preacher who made jokes about the Bible and God's holiness?

He went to hell and burned forever.

What's wrong?  No one is laughing.  





Dear Brother Steve,

Just a thank you for that article in the headlines section about so -called christian humor. I feel the same way and this will be a perfect way to pass this thought along to others. So many friends send this kind of stuff and think it's perfectly harmless. I was on an email list where they were doing this regularly and I brought up the same scriptures and they booted me off as a heretic! Again, thanks. Keep posting this kind of thing to your website. Some people really need to wake up.

In Christ,




Dear Brother,

I have read your section on how a number of churches, not just Evangelical and Charismatic, but also even Fundamental, KJV only churches have been making fun of the Holy Scriptures at the expense of God thinking it would appeal to the audience. This is nothing short of blasphemy and what the Holy Scriptures have warned against.

When I was in an Evangelical Anglican church many years ago, I was extremely disturbed by this disturbing trait of not only making fun of the Holy Scripture but also making a joke out of sin. Let me highlight some examples. One time the Anglican church I was attending was performing a drama which was supposed to be designed to lead people to Christ. However, in that drama, God was portrayed as a Creator that blundered by showing God saying things like: "Oh no! How could this happen?" It was supposed to be funny but I was not laughing.

Within the same drama, Christ was portrayed as a modern day party goer. Although I did not think very well back then, yet I remember a Christian visitor to the church going up to the minister rebuking him for daring to put on a blasphemous show.

When I was involved with that same Anglican church, I remember the youth leader putting on a drama of Christ on the cross. He took the words of our Lord in the Gospel of St. Matthew: "Eloi, Eloi, sabacthani", and made a mockery of it by having someone state in the drama: "It means: You are a donkey!" To which I responded with rebuke, stating what the correct meaning was as clearly stated in the Gospel and also rebuking them for even treating the Word of God as a joke.

Today, that wolf is no longer even in the church and has been himself destroyed in hjs marriage and other areas. God is not mocked! Equally disgusting was to see members of that church treat the sin of sodomy / homosexuality as a joke. This was done at a social gathering which I was present at. I then rebuked the persons in question and quoted to them Ephesians 5, which states that fornication and jesting should not be amongst the saints.

However, just as equally, KJV only Fundamental Baptist churches have not been exempt from this kind of behaviour. I know a certain fundamental Baptist pastor in Sydney who seems to have nothing better to do than to make jokes about the Holy Scripture. I have even heard him say them in the pulpit. I get very disgusted when I hear him do this. His name is Pastor H_____ of N________ Baptist Church in Sydney.

A number of people who have quit Protestantism and gone to the Orthodox Church have stated one of the many reasons they have against Protestantism is the way in which humour is aimed at the sacred so readily, something you most definitely will not find in the Orthodox Church! May this evil trend be repented of soon.

Yours in Christ,

Timothy Kwoh


Christian Humor: Mocking God For Fun and Profit

God's Billboards: Not About the God of the Bible

God Web's Jokes on God and the Truth

This is the best example on the web of cheap jokes on God and the Bible

More cheap rubbish



How to trivialize and pervert Scripture

If you start laughing at this, please click out at once.
My point is this. This video can seduce the godless AND Christians to join together in laughter.
Is that not a very clever device of Satan?

If this is the Gospel in 2019, then I KNOW God is about to destroy the world with fire.
Watch how the jerk builds up to the resurrection, and they he makes a joke of it.