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CHURCH SIGNS WHICH "RETURN VOID"
Or, "Shelling corn at the church house"
On this page we will be displaying church signs submitted by our readers from around the world. In the USA in recent years church signs have been dominated by clichés and silly humor and catch phrases. It is, in fact, blasphemy to do this, and while we will all see some humor in this and laugh at these silly signs, it is also tragic to see the crass Laodicean nonsense thrust forth along the wayside. This is the only message many sinners see from the alleged Bride of Christ.
We are showing no favorites here. Mongrelizing of the Truth has become notorious these days on Baptist and Charismatic church signs. The Lutherans, Presbyterians, and Reformed churches are more likely to use the Bible on their signs, though I wish they used the KJV more. I believe that the Reformers instilled a lot more of the fear of God in their followers than did the Anabaptists. Thus, 500 years later, the use of the Bible.
What is the alternative? What is the solution? How can we be (classy new speak word coming, brace yourself, this is HEAVY...) RELEVANT?
Answer in two steps:
12:31 Now is the judgment of this world: now shall the prince of this world be
Isaiah 55:11 So shall my word be that goeth forth out of my mouth: it shall not return unto me void, but it shall accomplish that which I please, and it shall prosper in the thing whereto I sent it.
On your church sign, if you want to be 100% sure God is in charge, post the Word of God, and lift up Jesus Christ. You cannot possibly have one void sign as long as you do this.
How can you help? SEND EMAIL with the words of a church sign you have seen. Send the name of the local church where the sign was seen, and tell us the city and state or province where you saw it. A digital photo attached in email will also be best. Just try to fill the photo frame with the signs and allow a bit of sky and the base mounting to help frame the photo. We can use only .jpg photos please. We are not interested in typos and obvious blunders, only premeditated sloppy agape.
We do give recognition to a few signs with the Bible on them. Send photos of those also. We should commend those who exalt the Word of God.
HERE ARE CHURCH SIGNS
DID NOT OWE
IS THE ONE
Might be a good idea
Really? I thought Jesus was wrapped in swaddling clothes.
This is a classic example of how the Bible alone would
have looked a LOT better.
Thanks to Linda D. for sending this one.
HAPPINESS IS AN
cliché from the world of criminal talk.
Happiness comes to the most wicked people.
Which means, there is more than one source of happiness.
Happiness to a Bible believer is NOT an inside job.
It is the work of the Holy Ghost.
I used to get around some space cadets in this
high browed politically correct mob in Michigan
while tuning pianos. I have always prided myself in my
ability to figure out the secret language of the glowing world.
Folks, I am sorry, but this one is beyond me.
Sometimes I feel like these people actually compete
with each other to see who can make the most meaningless
statements which sound profound and special.
Maybe it is all very simple--
The she bishop needs a step stool?
I know what you mean.
I have heard many of these Baptist blow hards
go on and on ad nauseum.
At least this boy is starting in the afternoon,
so the men may get home before midnight.
NEWLAND, NORTH CAROLINA
GOD IS LIKE COCA-COLA
HE'S THE REAL THING
Church of Christ
LORD, MAKE ME THE KIND OF MAN
DOG THINKS I AM
with toast for me, thank you.
This is a hippy Jesus I do not know.
2 Corinthians 11:4 For if he that cometh preacheth another Jesus,
whom we have not preached,
or if ye receive another spirit, which ye have not received,
or another gospel, which ye have not accepted,
ye might well bear with him.
reader who sent this in made this comment:
"Boy, I think these folks have never heard the Gospel Paul preached,
or understand that we're not under the Law, but under Grace.....
I see a pattern here of what WE do, nothing about what Jesus Christ
has already DONE. Fear, quilt et al added to get your money
and drain the very life out of you!"
John 19:30 When Jesus therefore had received the vinegar, he said,
It is finished: and he bowed his head, and gave up the ghost.
LIFE WITH A PURPOSE
social services lady asked little Pedro what he ate for breakfast at home.
"Beans and tortillas" said Pedro.
She asked what he ate for lunch.
"Beans and tortillas" said Pedro.
The lady was upset and asked if that is all he ever had to eat.
"Oh no," said Pedro excitedly, "For supper we have tortillas and BEANS."
And Pedro's life was about as exciting as the Baptists in the woods of Tennessee.
is not a biblical concept. One of God's choices when
we pray is to tell us that nothing is going to happen.
When Peter asked Christ to depart from him because
he was a sinful man, Jesus did NOT depart from Peter.
Aren't you glad he didn't?
never said this. When we claim to quote God,
we are bound to do it directly from the Word of God.
It is blasphemy to tell the world that we humans
are permitted by a dull silly God to quote him
when he never said the thing.
Like God just chuckles and thinks we are cool heads.
MAKE MANY JAMS
CHURCH OF CHRIST
a cheezie point of reference to
Yabba dabba doo,
CHURCH OF CHRIST
tell me why your new thinking is supportive
of Sodomy? I gladly prefer the old time
thinking of Moses on that one.
What a crass cliche!
And, it came to pass...
Great! Hell and damnation is
a mere cliche, right?
Puns are a lower order of humor
than cliches. A cliche can teach,
but a pun is just a clever joke.
The Church of God ain't.
SLOPPY AGAPE LINKS:
i GUESS WE CAN TOLERATE THIS--
IT IS NOT A CLAIM TO TRUTH
HERE IS CHAOS-- The lost, and Jews, have NO idea
what the Bible context is, so all this idiot hog pen
gets is hate and suspicion. They should keep their fool
mouth shut later when the Feds infiltrate their church to
see what they are really up to.
OK, LOTS SAID AND NO STUPID CLICHES-- Thanks
I trust the Gospel is inside.
REALLY, I THINK WE NEED TO COME TO THESE CHURCHES WEARING
GUM BOOTS AND A MANURE SHOVEL IN HAND
TRUNCATED, BUT THEY TRIED-- We give them an A-
WRONG VERSION, BUT THEY TRIED-- We give them a B
ANOTHER ONE FROM THE BIBLE-- Very positive message for Calvinists.
CLASSIC EXAMPLE OF THE DEPTH OF BAPTIST TEACHING THESE DAYS
Imagine if they had just used a Bible verse:
Romans 11:33 "O the depth of the riches both of the wisdom and knowledge of God!"
IMPLIED-- THE BIBLE IS DEAD UNTIL YOU HEAR IT FROM US
This is a very good application to the Liberal notion that the Bible becomes the
Word of God when you understand it.
THE ULTIMATE RUSH-- Changing the sign
50,000 BAPTIST CHURCHES HAVE THIS SCHEDULE
And, you can jolly well go to hell between Sundays.
HURRAH! A BIBLE VERSE, AND FROM ONE OF THE TRITE JOINTS.
I see the Bible all the time on washed out churches, while the Fundamentalists
post silliness and clichés. I believe devils run Fundamental churches these
days, by and large.
HERE IS A LIE
HERE IS THE TRUTH,
Matthew 12:37 "For by thy words thou shalt be justified, and by thy words thou shalt be condemned."
MY MOTHER IN LAW USED TO SAY, "A pun is the lowest form of humor"
She thought my puns were a bit silly, but she should have seen this sign.
CLEVER, FUNNY, BUT WHERE IT THE BIBLE ON CREATION?
This is a classic case of blather which will return void in the end.
A+ -- A BIBLE VERSE FOR A CHANGE
And, it is almost always on an Evangelical church
because Fundamentalists are such big mouthed show offs.
CLASSICALLY DULL, DIDDLY, AND DUMB METHODISTS
I would love to get Charles Wesley back to deal with these people for a few days.
HEAVY, BABY, VERRRRRY HEAVY
Fits so well with a tongues chattering joint
ANOTHER A+ FOR A HICK IN THE WOODS COC CHURCH
I just wish they would leave the water out of the Gospel,
and just be satisfied with the Blood of Jesus.
JACK ASS SIGN OF THE CENTURY
What does "get saved" mean to the guy in a Ford driving by?
Answer: Nothing. All he sees is, "Go to hell."
Now, its your turn--
Watch for signs, and SEND THEM TO US PLEASE