Steve's Yarns-- All those years growing up
and living in Oklahoma, California, Arizona,
Texas, and Africa..... Ain't done growing up
'til I get over on the other side :-)




EDITOR:
Steve Van Nattan

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  YARNS--
Archinve of topics which need
to be written

By Steve Van Nattan
An expatriate Wog with a story to tell

 

 

 

 

REQUEST A YARN

HERE IS THE LIST YOU CAN CHOOSE FROM

Find an unlinked article (in black, not blue), and SEND MAIL asking for that story.
I will do that story, post it on my online journal, and tell you when it is done.
Please type "STORY" in the subject line of your email. By doing this, you will be
helping motivate me to finish more yarns. Thanks

TABLE OF CONTENTS

The following include yarns of Steve and Elizabeth Van Nattan, and yarns of
other people that fit. If you read the menu of life below, I promise you that
you will find something you cannot resist. God gave Elizabeth and me priceless
experiences over a lifetime, and I try to make it worth your time to read here.

GROWING UP IN AFRICA

In progress- LIVING DANGEROUS

SKIP TO ME LOO
Stories about elimination adventures in Africa and discussions of other poopish ventures. This is an editorial diversion where I try to mention the unmentionable so we can all lighten up a bit.

TRAVELING BY RAIL AND BY LAKE
STEAMER IN AFRICA
--
FOUR PART SERIES COMPLETE

AROUND THE WORLD (KIAMBU, KENYA)
ON BOBBY HOLLENBECK'S BIKE

An adventure in the Hills above Kijabe mission station and a visit with an old Kikuyu shop owner

THE DAY THE FAT LADY SANG
My experience on the HMS Mauritania

MY CAREER AS A ROCKET SCIENTIST
Bob Capen and I as (short..... very short) career rocket scientists.

MY DAD THE IMPROVISER

LIVING WITHOUT THE GREENS
We had not idea there was a green way to do things back yonder. You decide who had it right.

MY ESCAPES FROM AMERICA--
VIA NEW YORK CITY-- FOUR TIMES !!

THE NIGHT THE DONKEY CAME TO PRAY

HOW TO TRAIN A PET LION IN KENYA

CHARLIE HESS-- This story is finally finished.

BBC- A NOSTALGIC LOOK BACK IN TIME

HE SHALL GIVE HIS ANGELS....

WALJI LOSES OUT TO HP PATEL

THE AFRICAN ADVANTAGE--
An African view of White Race Sophistication
This article is finally complete

MY KEEPERS
Staff and dorm parents at Rift Valley Academy

AZIZ AND AKBAR-- Muslims who were not the enemy

THE STORY OF MOUNT LONGONOT--
My adventure with Bob Capen

BABOONS-- The Smartest Apes in the World

EGGS-- Buying them and tithing them

FETCHING THE MAIL--  
Online browsers may load this one.

PAUL BEVERLY takes me on a bicycle ride.

RVA FOOD  Strange things-- Wonderful things

HAM BY MAIL  Or, The Ham that crawled in From the Cold.

BULL DOG, MUD FIGHTS--
Dinky toys, nyabs, and hill climbing

PINCHING ANTS-- Keep moving

MY DISCOVERY OF AN ANCIENT HISTORIC EVENT

I BUY BANANAS

HOTELS New Stanley, Fairview, Pan Africa, Lincoln Inn- Eldoret, Stagshead Inn, Bamburi

ALL OF OUR PETS

MY FIRST HABITATION IN AFRICA- Bishop Yeremiah

POWDERED MILK MIRACLE

HUNTING-- HIPPO, DOVES, NILE GOOSE, AND PLAINS

DINKY TOYS AND MECCANO

MY CANOE

MUD, TOPI, CHIKKA, MBUGA, SLIPPERY RED HELL

MAKING A SHORT WAVE RADIO

FERRY BOATS-- SIMIU, RUGEZI, NYAMTAKUZA

AMBOSELI VACATION

MWANZA

MY CONTRIBUTION TO THE COLD WAR AT KIJABE

VENTURES TO THE HILL TOP

LIVINGSTON HOUSE, STANLEY HOUSE

UHURU

MWANZA MISSION HOME

DELIVERANCE FROM DEVILS

HOW TO EAT THE FISH COURSE FIVE TIMES ON THE LAKE STEAMER / BEKELA MOLA FISH
TRAVELING ON THE LAKE STEAMER

AUGUSTA MANNING

1943 INDIAN- Add photo from disk

MOTHER SYWALKA

YANKEE CRICKET

CROSSING A LIVE VOLCANO

THE GUDGE

HIKING IN THE FOREST

HERB LION AND CARL ULINE PLAY A TRICK

ARTY DAVIS SEES A LEOPARD

FIELD DAY

RECIPE-  HIPPO FOOT

BWIRU COFFEE CALL (Combs)

KIAMBOGO BUILDING

A WEASEL CHASE

CHIPPING ROCKS

SORTING CARROT AND CELERY SEED

HYENAS

NARKIN-- SECRET AGENT FOR WHOM?

AMERICAN FLAG FLIES IN TANGANYIKA

KISUMU

SERGEANT MAJOR IN CHARGE

200 NECK TIES

WILHELM MAY KEEPS IT IN "ECONOMY GEAR"

BURNING FETISHES

HANS NYMAN RIDES A DONKEY

SIAFU-  ANTS IN YOUR PANTS Missionary preaching etc

FRANK MANNING

BARGAIN BANANAS

GOD'S KITTY SAVES MY DAD FROM A COBRA

AFRICAN FOOD VARIETIES

BUYING MILK AND EGGS (Ostrich egg)

"THE HOOVER KIDS ARE NORMAL"

ARABS AND KITANI

FORESTS GOD MADE--  KENYA HIGHLANDS, ARUSSI LAND, REDWOODS, BAMBOO

TRAIN TRAVEL IN KENYA

TRAVEL BY AIR EXPERIENCES

PETS IN AFRCA AND THE USA

AFRICANS I HAVE KNOWN

CHI-PUKIZI

SHEGE, BITIRU, NAHASHON AND MWANGI

BISHOP YEREMIA

CHIPUKIZI

GEBRE MICHAEL (Decamhare)

MZUNGU DINNER FOR THE PREFECTS

SAMMY KAMAU

BOREMA

Ato Tedla Desta

GEBRE MICHAEL

DR. GOBIZI


GROWING UP IN THE USA
Before and after life in Africa

MY FAVORITE KIDS' PROGRAM ON RADIO- CIRCA 1949

When little in LA area. Going to Safeway for day old Van de Kamp's baked goods. Also, Helms bakery truck. Good humor man.

HOW I WAS BORN AGAIN

HORNED TOADS AND BLUE RACERS- Quartzhill, apricot story, cantelopes, Westside School and bus ride, Messer, Tony Pellerin gets saved

COMMUNION SERVICE AT MENNONITE LIMA OHIO CONFERERENCE

MRS. MILLER DIPS SNUFF!

PRAYER MEETING AT THE VAN SCHOOL HOUSE

MY DAY OF FAME ON ART LINKLETTER'S HOUSE PARTY

SOUTH GATE HIGH SCHOOL- Geometry class kid, English, VPs party.

BROTHER VAN GOES TO TOWN

CHECKING UP ON DOMINO PLAYERS

PREACHING IN THE OZARKS

DEACON JONES WAKES UP

KEY OPENS THE WAY BUT STEALS MY HAT VICKS BOTTLES

 

VAN NATTAN FAMILY TALES

THE ROBIN WENTLY AND 1954

SIX WEEKS ON HENRY STREET IN BROOKLYN

SIM MISSION HEADQUARTERS

MY COOKING EXPLOITS- Shark stew, fried lettuce, egg fuu yung

GREYHOUND BUS STATION-- SAN FRANCISCO

MY SON DAN, THE EVANGELIST (Tim H and shopping and singing)

A MACHINE AND HALF A HOLE-- Life in Tennessee

 

FISHING TALES OF A LIFETIME

Frank Klaber catching a shark

Catching salmon in San Pedro

Danny nearly caught by a trout

Carfish from lake steamer- Sell to Africans. Hugh cat fish.

Jug fishing and trot lines Oklahoma

Off the pier in Laguna Beach- old timers- Chinese croakers w/peas- Pier fishing in Port Aransas, Texas.

Cheese balls in lake in CA

Mike and Mary at Pismo Beach- Bill's advice (describe him) Idiot who brought up a sting ray.

Fishing hole in Ethiopia 30 meter deep hole. Thread

Digging clams in Muskegon River Pismo Beach scuba men

African fishing for eel fish in Bwiru

Fish at Lake Langano

 

ARMY DAYS AT FORT KNOX

WINTER TALES- CQ duty and furnace, ice inside the house, going to work at Fort Knox getting through Vine Grove, snow plows in traffic, side road with no snow Mich driver ahead, link to Capusta story

BOB ASELTINE

MAJOR

GIB BENDER

COL KAPUSTA

PX MISERIES

McFarland story GETS DISCHARGED

RECRUITER FOR OCS

 

COLLEGE DAYS

J. C. THE DIPLOMAT

PIER FISHING

PUCH MOTORCYCLE

DODGE CAR

LINBURGER CHEESE TRICKS

LOCKED IN THE AUDITORIUM

GHOSTLY BAG

GOSS

LYNN AND I AT LARGE

BOB BONTRAGER ON THE WAY TO MENTAL INST.

GOSPEL CONCERT

AFTER GRADUATION Trip to Mich. "Sample Expediter" at paper co.

 

If you would like a particular yarn from the list below, SEND MAIL, and I will see what I can do. Also, if you can relate to one of the yarns in the menu at the right, phone me at:
V:I:II::VI:VII:III::III:III:0:IX

 

LINKS:

Great Place to Eat Ethiopian food.

Another one in Colombus, Ohio

This made tears come as my mind
went careening back with David's help


PASTORING ADVENTURES

THE SEVEN CYLINDER PONTIAC--
Adventures with devils

SNAPPING TURTLES

SOME DAMNED FOOLS I HAVE KNOWN
(Damned by their own rebellion against the Gospel of Jesus Christ)

NEWAYGO BIBLE SIGNS

HE SHOT HIS DOG

RUNNING TO AUCTIONS WITH LARRY AND KEN

ED ARNOLD'S TALES AND LOYALTY

THE CARRILLO STORY

CUSSING SHORTY HUNTER GOT SAVED

HOBO AND INTERSTATE EVENGELISM "I'm a Bible churcher"

CHURCH DINNERS

BIBLE STUDY AT IRONWOOD

SPIRITUAL WARFARE WITH METHODIST PREACHER

SPIRITUAL WARFARE OVER PORN STORE

SPIRITUAL WARFARE OF A REPENTENT SODOMITE

SPIRITUAL WARFARE OVER LIGHTS FOR THE PARK

SPIRITUAL WARFARE IN THE DONUT SHOP

SPIRITUAL WARFARE WITH SATANISTS (DALE Yermo)

SPIRITUAL WARFARE AND THE NEWAYGO SIGN STORY

SPIRITUAL WARFARE AND THE HUSTLER

SPIRITUAL WARFARE AFTER MIDNIGHT

SPIRITUAL WARFARE AND STAN AT PLANO

SPIRITUAL WARFARE WITH LADY WHO WANTED FITNESS CLASS

THE KING JAMES BIBLE ISSUE CHALLENGE

FRED AND EULA WHEAT

OLD MINE IN CALICO MOUNTAINS

ED ARNOLD

CRAIG POSEY RINGS THE BELL

C__________ SMITH REPENTS

CHRIS LEAVES THE ROMAN CATHIOLIC CHURCH

ETHIOPIAN DOCTOR IN GRINGO LAND

SUPERSTITION BECOMES POETRY, AND NOW POETRY GONE-- WHAT DOES THIS TELL US?

DEAD BODY IN THE MINE

DADDY BROUGHT THE FOOD HOME okra, jelly grass,

 

PIANO TUNING YEARS
Including Michigan, Arizona, Tennessee, and Texas

DO IT YOURSELF INTERNET BUSINESS

BILL THE SODOMITE GETS SAVED

WE WON'T BE NEEDING YOUR SERVICES

FUGITTI

ENGEBRETSEN AND NOGALES Edgar Valencia

WITCHES IN SIERRA VISTA

GREEK MANSION IN CANELO

ROAD TO NOGALES

MIRANA

CHIRICAWA MTS. AND AUSTIN RANCH

MR. NECHES IN ELFRIDA

MORMONS

LORDSBERG

HOLLER CANYON AND CHIHUAHUAS

KATRINA- nogales dyslexic

JESUS FIELD

SCHOOLS

TUNING IN CHURCHES

LESBIANS

MIRACLE VALLEY AND BRANHAMITES

SANTA FE RANCH

TOMBSTONE

BISBEE (Ed the piano tuner)

SIERRA VISTA PEOPLE

NOGALES

DENTIST IN MICHIGAN

THE PLAIN PEOPLE IN THE WOODS

JIMMY DORSEY BAND

NOGALES HIGH SCHOOL

PIANO ONLINE BUSINESS

TUNING IN A TENT

PEOPLE WHO FED ME GENEROUSLY

DOWN SIDE OF THE TRADE

BLESSING OF BEING A PIANO TUNER

 

GARDEN PLOTS

"AND THE LORD GOD PLANTED A GARDEN..."

LANGANO GARDEN

KENYA GARDEN

TEXAS HILL COUNTRY GARDEN

YERMO GARDEN

ARIZONA GARDEN

KENTUCKY GARDEN

 

MISSIONARY DAYS

WALKING MY MONKEY

MERV ROSELL and the four ships

MARIO AT BEKELA MOLA'S RESORT

NIGHT SCHOOL IN ELDORET

BAPTISTS IN AFRICA

ITDAKO CHURCH

DROUGHT IN AFRICA

PETER DIGS A DITCH AND TOPS A TREE

MARY'S FRIEND SAVES HER LIFE

NO FAZER, NO MUZER, HUNGRY TODAY

RIDING THE BUS TO ADDIS

SHOPPING IN ETHIOPIA

BEKELA MOLA'S HOTELS Mojo, Ziwai, Langano, Awassa
Get graphics

MR. SPEEDY'S TEA PARTIES

DECAMHARE SCHOOL DAYS

NUGUSSEY AND DEVILS

GOD SENDS A MAN TO PUT TRUSSES UP

BUILDING A ROAD

BUILDING A DAM

BUILDING AN OUTHOUSE

RED TAPE IN AFRICA

THE KEFO

ZETEN BIR

JACK JOHNSON-- Pastor from N. Ireland to missionaries

ASMARA

"SOLD"

ITAKO AND AFRICA ISRAEL NINEVAH (John)

SIMON STANDS TALL

DINI IN ELDORET

KIPKAREN CHURCH

KITALE CHURCH

DOWNTOWN ELDORET-- BANSAL, BAHARILAL, AZIZ AND AKBAR

 

TALES FROM THE WEB JOURNAL

BOOKS I HAVE READ

ONE OFF THINGS I HAVE DONE

 

RESTAURANTS AND FOOD ALONG THE WAY

(Make a page for the following)

USA

Ma Gansy's

Doe Run Inn

Automats (NYC)

Streets of New York City-- circa 1953

Cedars of Lebanon Dearborn

Blue Nile in Trapper's Ally

Fisherman's Number Nine (San Francisco)

Happy Woc

Dahlia Restaurant

Hunan in Los Angeles (and China town)

International House of Pancakes

Palm Restaurant (Barstow)

Tri-City Cafe

Hilltop Cafe

Oregon Cafe on lumber logging route

West Texas cafes

ETHIOPIA

Omar Khayam

Addis Ababa Restaurant

Bekela Mola

Villa Verde and Asmara

Debra Birhan

Chung Hua

U.S. Embassy cafe in Ethiopia

KENYA

Vendors in train stations

The Lincoln Hotel

Stag's Head in Nakuro

Fairview

International (Japanese)

Lundiani Railroad Station Stagshead later

New Stanley

Norfolk

Bangers and chips

Nakuru Truck Stop

ENGLISH FULL COURSE DINNER AND OTHER STRANGE CUSTOMS

TANZANIA

Arab Bakeries
Mandazi and tea, Meat Samusas, The Hot Bread

Halfway Stop to Kola Ndoto

Ice Cream Soda

THE UK

Lion's Corner House

Windsor Castle and Ye Olde King's Head Inn graphic

INTERNATIONAL MISSIONS CLUB-- LONDON

STEVE'S TEX-MEX YARNS

BALAAM'S ASS SPEAKS BLOG

 



 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

For the record:
Every story is copyrighted.
You may SEND MAIL asking to use the stories, but here are the rules:

2. Ask first. Everything on this site is copyrighted at the US Patent Office under a previous web site name, BALAAM'S ASS SPEAKS.
Thou shalt not steal.

3. You may use there yarns if you do not alter, truncate, or enhance one word of the text, though you may arrange it to fit your web site format.
Changing typos and syntax errors are obviously your choice, but check on place names.
Flickr photos are given credit, which you should also do.

4. You may add your thoughts to parts of the story if you make it VERY clear that it is your comment, not mine.

5. If you change anything to make mockery of Jesus Christ or the Word of God, I shall expose you vigorously in
other areas of this journal and elsewhere online. LIKE HERE You may mock me all you like IF you do not edit the story.
I delight in being mocked personally by the adversary, for it brings me more traffic.

6. You pastors may use any story you like as a sermon illustration and print it in weekly or monthly news letters
OFF THE WEB without notifying me. If you use anything on a church web site, please give credit and links.

7. Be careful about using the word "gullible." They have taken that word out of the dictionary.

 

 

NOTICE:
If you wish to communicate with me by phone, call: 512 673-3309
I am particularly eager to be motivated to talk about African issues if you think of one that needs attention.

ANOTHER NOTICE:
If you are an old coconspirator from the past, or if you just want to hear some chatter about long ago, call please, and we will make time in our busy schedule of puttering about the ranch to spend time together and make some wog chai (African tea). We particularly welcome African students in the USA who want to hear about the old paths in east Africa. If you are a child of the British Empire colonial era in Africa, we would also love a visit from you. We might even manage a bit of curry for tea.

YET ANOTHER NOTICE:
This is not the last notice, mind you, so check back every day to see what I finally put here. It may be urgent.

FINAL NOTICE:
See "YET ANOTHER NOTICE" just above please.

 

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