THINGS JESUS DID NOT DO--

AFTER HIS RESURRECTION

 

1. He did not hold an election or hold a business meeting.

2. He did not appoint a ways and means committee.

3. He did not publish a book of his "standards" on hair, hemlines, and
attendance at gatherings.

4. He did not claim that the only manifestation of his Blood in the future
would be called Baptist, Pentecostal, Reformed, Lutheran, or any other mongrel moniker.

5. He did not start making a list of "members" of his movement.

6. He did not have a door on a building which was a signal to gather, as in,
"You should be there every time the church house doors are open." Nor did
he put up a church sign with stupid clichés on it every week instead of
Bible verses.

7. He did not build a "world headquarters."

8. He did not start a seminary or Bible College.

9. He did not arrange for some disciple to always introduce him and
brag on his resurrection before he appeared to people.

10. He did not take an offering or hold a "faith promise" giving promotion.
He did not teach tithing, nor did the Apostles after him.

11. He did not send out the disciples as traveling evangelists, doing one night stands, living off of the offering plates of local churches, and leaving their wives and babies at home half starved while they watched Greek peep shows (closed circuit TV in motel rooms had not yet been invented).

12. He did not make any rules about who could remember his death at the Lord's Supper.

13. He did not tell anyone on which day to meet and remember him.

14. He did not organize a mission board or non-profit corporation.

15. He did not start a publishing house.

16. He did not start a Sunday School or buy 70 camels to bring kids into Jerusalem.

17. He did not appoint a chairman, president, moderator, monsignor, cardinal, or Pope.

18. He did not designate robes or ecclesiastical clothing for the apostles.

19. He did not draw up a creed nor call a church council to rule on doctrine.

20. He did not call up an ordination committee to ordain the Apostles.

21. He did not hold a revival meeting "under the big tent in downtown Opandopolis."

22. He did not make a "Jesus movie" or a "Passion" movie.

23. Jesus did not sell a big red book called "Basic Youth Conflicts," and he
did not run around promoting "Purpose Driven Synagogue."

24. Jesus did not buy a three piece robe set from Babylon, wear a ring from his synagogue rabbinical school, or buy a two farthing doctorate from a Greek in Jerusalem based on his "work experience" serving Jehovah.

25. Jesus did not move his crucifixion from Wednesday evening to Friday evening to accommodate the Roman Catholics and Fundamentalists.
Nor did he move the Last Supper to Thursday evening to accommodate the Lutherans (Maundy Thursday).

26. Jesus did not move Resurrection Sunday to Easter to accommodate the Roman Catholics and the Fundamentalists.

27. Jesus did not invent church pews so that Bible believers for 2000 years would have to look at the backs of one another's heads.

28. Jesus did not give one altar call, nor did Peter, Paul, or any other Apostle.

29. Jesus did not advertise in the Yellow Pages to convince all the religious losers in Judea to believe his church "had something for everyone."

30. Jesus did not hang out in an office in the temple "getting my sermon ready" while the disciples floundered spiritually and vocationally (fishing) out on the lake. (POW !! Gotcha, slow belly!)

31. Jesus, before or after his resurrection, never gave any saint the TITLE Father, or Reverend. These two are official titles of the Roman Whore and have been adapted by Fundamental Bible believers. Jesus often rejected titles given him. No one but God is to be called "Reverend." Psalm 111:9

31. Neither Jesus nor any of his Apostles had a deep need to start a ministry to troubled women. Nor did they age grade ANY of their effort. They targeted the men in the home and the kids followed.

32. Jesus did not make one food law, nor did his Apostles other than eating blood. That includes laws about wine. None! Solomon's cautions apply. Paul suggests people with stomach trouble take a little wine, and that was alcoholic if it was to work.

33. He did not, not even once, stand in front of his beloved friends, his sheep, and yell, yea scream, "GET RIGHT!"

 

 

ON THE OTHER HAND,
WHO DID JESUS TRUST TO GET IT RIGHT?

Apostles--
He gave them the New Testament which is all the standards you need.

The Holy Ghost--
Jesus sent him to teach us all things.

Husbands--
He gave them to teach wives everything they need to know about Christian life.

Mothers--
Jesus gave kids Christian Moms to teach them all that Daddy found in the Bible. Mike Pearl is NOT to be the standard for a Christian home, unless you want a Christless loonie bin. Mike Pearl NEVER talks about how God trains his children-- it is all about how the Amish train their kids and mules. The Amish are more pagan than Hindus and Ubangis. I know Amish who had to literally flee from the nice people the Pearls exalt in order to keep their sanity and faith in Christ.

Aged Women--
Jesus gave the Church older women to teach the younger women.
Any church where the pastor teaches the younger women ANYTHING is a hell hole and whore house. Pastors have wives and older woman to do that. A pastor with a "ministry to women" is running a whore house.

Pastors, Evangelists, and Teachers--
But, all they are authorized by him to do is minister (that is "serve" in the original Greek), and edify the saints. None of them were commissioned to rule anything or anyone. Jesus said he would do that himself just fine.

 

Jesus did not need Bill Gothard and his queer authored big red book, he did not need Clyde Narramore, nor Dr. Dobson, nor Purpose Driven Cheese, nor Emerging Blather, nor Promise Keepers, nor Michael and Debby Pearl, nor Bible colleges and seminaries, nor any other late great addition of human effort.

FURTHERMORE; preacher, your standards be damned ! ! Jesus did not want them, and they are blasphemy of the Holy Ghost who is all sufficient that the man of God may be perfect, throughly furnished unto all good works.

 

"Our Standards" or "Traditions of man"

Over the past 1900 years plus, all church movements have added "traditions of man" to the truth found in the New Testament. The Acts and Epistles were intended by God to be sufficient that the man of God might be throughly furnished unto all good works.

Like the Pharisees added the Mishna, their picky rules, to Moses' law, Catholics, Reformed churches, all the way to the most narrow Fundamental King James Version ONLY Bible believers have added and added. With very few exceptions, they find ways, like the Pharisees, to claim their traditions are planted solidly on the foundation of the Epistles.

THEY LIE. They live for the traditions, and they proclaim the New Testament in the context of their traditions with tricks and twisting of the context to make the plan work. The end of the Age of Grace will be marked by spiritual nakedness.

Revelation 3:17 Because thou sayest, I am rich, and increased with goods, and have need of nothing; and knowest not that thou art wretched, and miserable, and poor, and blind, and naked:

Are YOU a naked Christian keeping "standards" and traditions to give you confidence?

Look at the verse above. You preachers are the worst-- "knowest not..." That is your state. You do not even know what an offense you are and how utterly naked you are in the light of the doctrine of the Apostles. Let me be the brat kid who does the unspeakable, that which you faithful dumb lambs will not do..........

"The king's got no clothes...."

 

Do you have a "tradtion of men" to add? SEND IT BY EMAIL


ORAN TELLS IT LIKE IT IS

Oran is my mechanic. He owns a small auto repair shop in Midtown, and he also has a great zeal for the Lord. We were talking about the way the Lord's Church has been affected much these days by evil. His analysis is:

"There are three things that are wrecking the Lord's Church-- Education, Traditions of men, and fables."

No one has ever said it any better.

 

EDUCATION:

Olan went on to say that the kind of education he meant was the kind that made men proud and eager to ignore the Word of God.

1 Corinthians 8:1 Now as touching things offered unto idols, we know that we all have knowledge. Knowledge puffeth up, but charity edifieth.

Knowledge does NOT promise edification. Indeed, the vast majority of the time, knowledge leads men to hell. In the 50s, it was just the Liberals who feasted their souls on education. Today, it includes most Fundamentalists.

Education is the fetish of pagans who play church. They follow their college and seminary PhDs like the Africans follow a little bird through the forest and make life decisions based on the every move of the little bird. The American birds are just a lot bigger and wear three piece suits.

 

TRADITIONS OF MEN

Jesus accused the Pharisees of adding their traditions to the law of Moses.

Mark 7:9 And he said unto them, Full well ye reject the commandment of God, that ye may keep your own tradition.

Jesus was not talking to Philistines-- he was talking the the Fundamentalists of his day, the Pharisees. Traditions are never made to stand alone. No one wants to have to defend traditions alone. So, the traditions are founded on the Word of God and are added to it. The Pharisees claimed to be defending Moses' law as they added thousands of appendices from 2000 years of traditions. Believers today feel intimidated by self-assured pastors who tell them that the traditions are not there to replace the Word of God, they just make church life more orderly. That is the very same logic the Pope uses, and the same game the Pharisees used.

2 Thessalonians 2:15 Therefore, brethren, stand fast, and hold the traditions which ye have been taught, whether by word, or our epistle.

If your ways and standards are not grounded on literal texts from the New Testament, especially the Epistles, you are as wicked as the Pope. Let me illustrate with a tradition which virtually ALL Fundamentalists teach and defend-- church membership on a man's list. It is NOT found in the New Testament, and ANY way you defend it is a pack of lies. You know it, you may even be self-conscious about it, but you are a WIMP for not dealing with it. There are hundreds more traditions your observe also.

1 Peter 1:18 Forasmuch as ye know that ye were not redeemed with corruptible things, as silver and gold, from your vain conversation received by tradition from your fathers;

Colossians 2:8 Beware lest any man spoil you through philosophy and vain deceit, after the tradition of men, after the rudiments of the world, and not after Christ.

May I suggest that we all boldly confront preachers to prove their traditions are founded in Apostolic teaching from the Epistles? Let's start with tithing.

 

FABLES?

1 Timothy 1:4 Neither give heed to fables and endless genealogies, which minister questions, rather than godly edifying which is in faith: so do.

Are Fundamental Bible believers guilty of teaching fables? One sex pervert from Hammond said that every man of God needs a second woman in his life, and he had one. One man in Texas says that the preacher should be consulted when a couple wants to have another baby. A large group of Baptists tell us that they are the official Bride, and anyone else will be their servant in heaven. How is this different from the teaching that the righteous will have 70 virgins in Paradise, a la Muhammed? There are other fables too-- these are the lies about how many souls got saved and how many were baptized.

One preacher told me that he was casting a devil out of someone, and the devil would not talk. So, some unseen force started forcing the man to nod his head yes or no to my friend's questions. He asked the person who was forcing his head to nod, and the man said, "Michael." My friend went into fits of awe and asked if he meant Michael the Archangel. The man said it was. My preacher friend, a Fundamentalist, still believes he was visited by Michael the Archangel. How is this different from Veronica Leukin, the diddle head Catholic mystic from Bayside, NY, who claimed to see visions of "Our Aquamarine Boy" Michael and Mary?

There are the Charismatic fables about Muslims having visions of Jesus appear to them, gold dust falling from heaven, and Jesus taking the guru to heaven and having a water fight with him in the River of Life. There has never been a time in Church history, like now, when your could start a fable, take a patent out on it, and have a following of thousands believe you. Sell the book rights to Zondervan, and you can retire.

Oran, my friend, you have got it pretty much on target. Education, traditions, and fables. And, what follows is a church that is poor and blind and naked-- the preacher has no clothes.

God pukes.

Revelation 3 !!

May I suggest you print this and hand it to your pastor next Sunday?

 

 

LINK:

READ A PASTOR ON TRADITIONS OF MEN

 

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spchk